Divorce Court

A LETTER FROM A MOTHER WHO LOST CUSTODY IN DIVORCE COURT

Dear Mama,

I never imagined I would sit in a courtroom and hear a judge tell me my children were no longer mine to raise. That moment is burned into me. I can still see the stiff wooden benches, the piles of paperwork on the judge’s desk, and my attorney leaning over, trying to comfort me while my ears rang so loud I couldn’t make out a word. I remember standing up when it was over, my legs like stone, and walking out with empty hands. That walk felt endless.

After that, I shut down. I stopped answering my phone. I couldn’t bear to look at anyone, because I thought they all saw me as a failure. I carried shame everywhere I went, and the silence of my house pressed in on me until I thought I’d break. People who once called me “Mom” avoided the word, and eventually I stopped calling myself that too.

But then something cracked open. I found people who didn’t look at me like I was ruined. They didn’t judge me or take my motherhood away from me. They reminded me that love doesn’t disappear because of a ruling, and that my children still needed me—even if they weren’t under my roof. They needed my letters. They needed my phone calls. They needed proof that I was still fighting, even if I was broken.

It hasn’t been easy. There are still nights when I ache so deeply I can’t sleep. But I’ve learned that my story didn’t end in that courtroom. I am still their mother. I will always be their mother.

If you are standing where I once stood, please don’t let that gavel be the last word. You still have chapters left to write. You still have love to give. You can show up again, even if it feels impossible. I believe in you because I’ve lived it, and I know it’s possible.

With love,
A mom who walked out of court with empty arms but not an empty heart